Israel's Independence day

It is once again Israel's Independence day. It is now 58 years old, quite young in country years, I guess. We celebrate our Independence Day right after our Memorial Day, to remember all the soldiers and heroes who died in protecting our home. On one hand this union makes sense, but on the other hand, I've found that a lot of Jewish holidays combine tragedy with happiness in a disturbing way. In fact, according to Jewish belief, the arrival of the Messiah will come only after years and leagues of pain and suffering. Every holiday we have has some sort of bad memory involved in it, in which we were likely almost wiped out by some enemy. I haven't noticed this fact until recently, after reading a short story about the subject. It is a discomforting thing to know, as it points to something very... well, wrong, with the way we think. Now I'm not a religious man and I never will be, but I am part of this religion, part of this society, and what does it say of my people? My brother says that it makes sense; you can't experience true joy if you haven't experienced sadness. And I agree, but that does not mean those two have to come together. We do not need to feel guilty whenever we're happy. This brings me back to Independence Day or, in its Hebrew name, Yom Ha’atzmaut. As far as religion goes, we will not change our customs, but why did these two days, Yom Ha'atzmaut and Yom Hazikaron (Memorial Day), two events that are not religious, have to coincide the way the rest of our religious holidays do? Couldn't we spare a day in the year to remember all our misfortunes, and make a completely different day to be happy?
And now I come to another point, the hypocrisy of remembering and grieving over dead soldiers. You see, practically every day of the year, our mentality, what we're being fed by the army, is that 'it's good to die for your country'. We're being enticed to join fighting units and protect our families, a noble cause, to be sure. But then, on Memorial Day, we cry for those who died, ask 'why did they have to die?' and 'when will the fighting stop?’ Shouldn’t those thoughts occupy our minds all year long, and not only on one day of the year? Am I the only one who sees the hypocrisy? How can you tell a soldier, a person, a child, that it's good to die for this cause, and then cry about his or her death, when they only did what you taught them was right. If it's good to die for your country we should celebrate their deaths not mourn them. Obviously this is crazy, because we miss the people we lose, especially to war, but then it is also crazy to teach these people that it's good to die. It never is.